Pop's Wedding
Hey everybody,
It’s been three years since I was last in Thailand and judging by the laughter when I attempt to order dinner my pronunciation of the Thai language has not improved appreciably during that time. Luckily I’ve been hanging out with Pop so I haven’t had to do much other than say hello and goodbye and I’m hungry. Speaking of Pop, those of you who know him are probably familiar with the fact that his English can sometimes be… let’s say a bit challenging to understand. I do pretty well but I’ve known Pop for 13 years. Julian said once that Pop and I are like Chewbacca and Han Solo because I’m the only one who understands what he’s saying. Anyhow, when you see Pop in Thailand it’s a whole other story. The guy is constantly talking, bargaining, making people laugh, on the phone, and is as smooth as can be. I don’t understand what he’s saying but you can tell by the body language and by other people’s reactions that the guy has a way with words. I asked him if it’s frustrating for him when he’s in the U.S. that he obviously can’t communicate the same way that he can in Thai. Pop just shrugged his shoulders and said that as long as he has friends who are patient with him when he’s trying to get something across it’s no big deal (mai pen rai). I, on the other hand, can speak fluent Italian but I fly into an internal rage when I’m in Italy and somebody makes a joke I don’t get or utters some colloquialism I can’t understand. That’s the difference between Thais and Italians I guess. Well, that and body hair.
Thailand is very familiar to me since I’ve spent a good chunk of time here but it still takes a few days of adaptation. I think I’ve described Bangkok as organized chaos before and that hasn’t changed. Everyone seems to be conducting their everyday business out on the street and between the market stalls, the crowds on the sidewalk and the ambulatory vendors there’s barely any room to walk. I spent the first couple of days following Pop around as he was running errands in preparation for his wedding. It gave me the chance to pepper him with questions about Thai culture, the economy, ladyboys, sex tourism… basically anything that came to mind about Thailand. Pop summed up the Thai philosophy very succinctly: “Thai people are ok with anything.” There’s more to it than that but that is the basic gist. By the time Ramanan and the others arrived a few days later I was mostly over the jetlag and one step ahead of the rest of the group. Paul arrived a day late… he missed his flight because he got AM and PM mixed up. Come on… who does that?
We had one full tourist day before the wedding where Randy, Paul and I packed in visits to the golden Buddha, Wat Pho and the Grand Palace. I’d seen a couple of these on previous trips but it was worth a return trip, especially for the reclining Buddha. You’ll see from the pictures that it’s an enormous statue of the buddha that’s maybe 30 feet high and over 100 feet long with intricate inscriptions on the soles of the feet. It was also remarkable to see that the temples and palaces are kept so meticulously shiny. The paint looks fresh and the small pieces of stained glass that make up the outside of most of the buildings look almost new. That evening we sat ringside and saw two knockouts in nine bouts of Muay Thai fights at Ratchadamnoen stadium. Of course we had to pay farang (foreigner) prices for the tickets although smooth Pop got us a 300 baht discount. Over the course of the day Paul impressively sweat through two shirts and in the week I’ve been here has already done laundry twice.
As many of you know I’m a tremendous fan of weddings. I don’t have an accurate count but I think I’ve been to over 50 weddings, been a member of the wedding party 10 times and have officiated two myself (thank you Universal Life Church). This was definitely the earliest I’ve had to get up for a ceremony… we had to be at Kae’s house by 5 AM because that’s when the fortune teller told Pop that they had to start . Since Pop and Kae are ethnically Chinese it was a mixture of Thai and Chinese customs, one of which was the procession bearing gifts into the bride’s house. Paul and I got the plate of raw pork shoulder and liver which would’ve been fine except Pop took a while to negotiate with Kae’s family to let us in and that pork was heavy. And it was 5 AM. And it was liver. After we got inside there were more negotiations and more jokes and and more red envelopes as we made our way up the stairs until we got to the top floor of Kae’s house where they wouldn’t let us pass unless we sang a song. So we decided on the only song that apparently is known both in the U.S. and in Thailand… Jingle Bells. And so there we were at 5 AM in a Bangkok suburb smelling like pork liver and singing Jingle Bells at the top of our lungs with a bunch of Thai people as part of a wedding ritual. You can’t make that up.
The rest of the ceremony consisted of the two families sitting together and talking then exchanging gifts, money, and eventually rings. Pop’s uncle talked quite a bit and there was a lot of laughing and clapping and general happiness all around. There were a few poignant moments however because Pop’s dad had unexpectedly passed away only a couple of weeks ago. You would have never been able to tell from the general demeanor of the Thapanangkun family, even for the few days that I stayed at Pop’s house, but there were a few moments during the ceremony and especially at the reception later in the evening where things understandably became a bit emotional. I really felt for Pop because it was obvious that he’s been feeling a lot of conflicting emotions during the last couple of weeks, and through it all it seemed like his greatest concern was for us (his foreign friends) and whether we were ok. That’s just the kind of guy that he is… Pop is probably the most genuinely generous person that I know. I’m really, really happy for him because Kae is a fantastic person with a terrific spirit and they seem good for each other. The reception was later that evening with a live band, a nine-course meal, two emcees, speeches by Pop and Kae and a bouquet toss that was strictly for foreigners. I’m pretty sure Pop and Kae didn’t eat or sleep all day but Pop still wanted to take us out for a beer on Soi Cowboy, I think mostly to see if we could tell the ladyboys from the actual women.
The last couple of days Paul and I have been lounging around on Ko Samet, an island about 3 hours east of Bangkok, not really doing much of anything but in a good way. It’s rainy season so it’s not too crowded which is a stark counterpoint to Bangkok. Our only task for today was to sort out a bus back to the city for tomorrow. Then we walked 50 yards to lunch, then maybe another 20 yards to the beach, then maybe another 50 yards to get a foot massage. Now we’re trying to get up the energy to walk to dinner. I don’t even know what day it is.
Take ‘er easy,
Dave